Tell me, what is the thing that stirs your heart? What is the thing you cannot stop thinking about? What is the very thing which makes your step a bit lighter and your smile a little brighter? That is the thing that your souls wants. That is what your souls needs. Now, what are you […]
I am scared. To write. Even though it is the very thing that gives me life and makes me breathe deeper breaths. It centers me. It grounds me.
Unraveling can happen. Layers peeled back. Writing is like watering. It gives life and opens me up like a flower’s bloom, which has closed upon itself when rooted in dry and barren soil. And although the revealing is the place I am most comfortable residing, it is also the place that strips me of my armor and leaves me standing there, naked.
The ocean has always been a place of renewal for me. A place to center my mind and heart. A place where I can take all that is weighing me down, and let that shit go. I was looking forward to doing just that while watching the rhythmic dance of the ocean. In with the good, out with the bad.
Losing myself and my self-worth was a gradual process through motherhood, divorce and mental illness. My son was diagnosed in his early elementary years and we’ve been through some dark and trying times of crisis. All of my energy went to him and being his advocate. Fighting for him. Over time, my energy waned. My strength deteriorated and my sense of self disappeared. I was so completely broken.
We take that old language arts lesson of compare and contrast and we apply it to our bodies, our relationships, our lives. And it knocks the breath right out of the courageous lives we’re living.
Let it go.
It’s not easy. I know. I fight this battle over and over and over again. I have lived this life for forty three years; I’m half way to forty four. And I still fight this ridiculous war. Exhaustion is setting in. Why waste this precious time waging a war? Even more sobering a fact, this war is a war that I declared on myself.
Progress. The older I get, the more I realize not only how imperative it is, but also which kinds of progress are truly the most meaningful. It isn’t the progression of collecting things that matter. It isn’t the progression of measuring up to the people around you (at work, in the neighborhood, at the gym). It isn’t […]
We hold hope like a handle. Holding us steady In times of trouble. We hug faith like our best friend. Steadying us when we sway Or feel off balance. We live love As fear threatens to take over. We must choose light When our days are darkest. And seek strength When our hearts feel weakest. It’s okay […]
Several people have commented or asked why I take so many pictures of Noah sleeping. Excellent question. Every night, I tuck Noah into bed…pulling the covers up under his chin, pushing the hair off his forehead with my fingers, just enough to unveil the perfect spot for my kiss. We pray, I tell him I […]
Sometimes, life gets hard. Sometimes, life gets stressful. Sometimes…we wonder how we’re going to make it through another day. And sometimes, we find it really hard to feel blessed and grateful for what we have. And it is on these days, when it feels so hard, and so challenging to find good in the day […]